Monday, April 6, 2009

HARD day!

I had a rough day. Today was my first day back to work after being off for 6 weeks with Ayana. We have a caretaker coming to the house to watch her while I’m at work. When I got to work, 6 weeks of backed up work waiting for me that needs to be done yesterday. Overwhelming!!!!!!!! Then an agent wanted to show our house in the middle of the day at the last minute and the house wasn’t exactly in showing condition so I rushed home and the time I would have spent with her for lunch was spent cleaning.
I get home after a hard day and Ayana didn’t act excited to see me but was in love with the caretaker. I guess I should be happy she likes her but I have to admit, I was so jealous. She normally gets so excited to see me. Will she think the caretaker is her mommy and not me??????????????????

Heartbroken,

Amber

8 comments:

Domestic Goddess said...

UGH!!!! I prayed for you ALL day today, it has been on my mind constantly. Going back to work is SOOO hard! Not only because of everything you had waiting for you but having to leave her. It's a very good thing that you found someone who can come to the house and I am right there with you, I would have been balling to see her happy with her instead of me! The good thing is she is HAPPY! At least she is not that kid that screams everytime you leave the room, LOL! You know she misses her Mommy like crazy and she will get on the schedule of knowing when you come and go for work, that will make things easier for her to understand! I love you and miss you like crazy (10 more days!) and please know that I prayed for you today (A LOT) and I will continue to!!! Give everyone hugs for us!

Emily said...

Oh Amber, being a working mom is so rough sometimes! I remember the first day with Oscar. There were definitely some tears! You guys will be just fine, Ayana will know you are her mommy and be happy with her caretaker while you are away. Good luck. Transitions are so hard!

jamullins said...

That is tough!! She'll know her mommy though!!!


Julie

Lori S said...

That is so hard! I can remember feeling so bad when I would leave my kids and they would cry and cry. But, I also remember it being worse when I would drop them off and they would run off. But, it was even worse when I would go to pick them up and they didn't want to leave!!!

Chantelle Becking said...

What a tough day! I am so sorry! It is a major transition...Bianca spent one night with her mimi and was devastated to have to come home with her three horned mom! Know this is totally normal, and still it sucks!
Hang in there...She knows her momma.
Much Love
Chantelle

Autumn said...

Awww! Poor thing! That is hard.
I know it's hard, but I think that you definitely went about it the right way. For one, she is in her own home, napping in her own bed, playing with her own toys. And the caretaker obviously takes very good care of her, which is sooo important! And remember, kids are capable of having close relationships with multiple people--God made them that way! This is healthy and good for them. God also made another rule: No one can replace Mom!

Also, from the caregiver's perspective, remember that she is going to do everything she can to make sure that Ayana is one happy baby when you get home. Assuming she knows your schedule, she is probably engaging Ayana in something "extra fun" shortly before you get home. The last thing SHE wants is for you to come home to an unhappy baby and wonder why (especially on her first day!). What she's thinking isn't "See how much she likes me?", it's "See what a good job I am doing? You're happy with my performance, right?" (I'm speaking as an insider here--I've been there!)

You might try doing the same routine when you come home to her every evening to help her with the transition--like giving her a mini massage or playing a certain game. I know that routines are very comforting at this age and transitions are hard without it. If you do the same thing every time, after a while she will understand that it means that Mommy is home for the night.

Sorry I'm always trying to fix all your baby problems all the time. If you ever want to ignore any or all of my good-intentioned but unsolicited advice go right ahead. I've been there, too! :)

Beautiful Mess said...

I will pray for you guys. I know that has to be tough.

God bless you!

dan and rachel said...

oh, amber, i am so sorry! that sounds like a really hard day!

she knows you're her mommy! maybe she was "punishing" you for leaving?! my kids do that sometimes. once she knows the routine, i'm sure she'll be so excited to see you!

((((HUGS)))))

rachel